This weekend I learned that there are some friends who seem to find all of my imperfections and flaws and notice every little thing that I do wrong and make me into an awful and terrible person! It's a really humbling and not so pleasant experience when someone throws everything that they detest about your unpleasant personality and crappy friendship in your face! It really made me realize that even though I feel like they don't know me at all, there are some things that I could really improve on and do better at! Even so, the feelings of self doubt and inferiority are not ones that I wish to have on a regular basis, no matter what good I can get out of them!
On the other hand, I am blessed to have people and friends in my life who love me because of my quirks and who see my growth and strengths and somehow always overlook the negative! In moments of weakness, I remember what they've said to me and the change and improvement that I have made over short and long periods of time! It helps me to remember that even though I may not be the perfect friend, daughter, sister, or acquaintance of any kind, I am making an effort to be the best person that I can be and my efforts are being noticed! Thank you to all of you who keep me going and are forward focused for my benefit!
Most importantly, no matter what ANY person in this world thinks of me, there is only one whose opinion truly matters! The ultimate judge will decide in the end what kind of person I really was here on earth! He knows the desires and intent of my heart, He knows that none of us can do everything perfectly, and He knows that even when we try to be the best, we will fall short of our goal! As long as I'm living in a way that I know is pleasing to him, I have nothing to worry about, and nothing that anybody says or thinks of me should affect how I feel about myself or anyone else for that matter! Christ's love is the greatest of all, and through him, I can become perfect in the end because he will make up the difference of the things that I can't do as well as I wish I would (or anyone else wishes I would for that matter)!
So, thank you to people who help me to recognize this on a daily basis, encourage me to change, or help me to keep improving the way that I am! I WILL NEVER STOP BEING MYSELF BECAUSE IT'S THE ONE THING THAT NOBODY CAN TELL ME I'M DOING WRONG!!!
Monday, February 15, 2010
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I've been having similar feelings as of late. And then I got your letter in the mail. It makes my day and when I start to feel awful about myself, I just read your letter that I have taped above my computer. Thank you for that. And thank you for being so positive and cheerful. You have improved my life. Just remember you can't be everywhere for everybody, we just have to do our best and others need to have more faith that we are doing all that we can at this moment in our lives. Love you!
ReplyDeletethat was something i needed to read, thank you!
ReplyDeleteTake it from someone who has had a fair amount of feelings of self doubt and inferiority for most of her adult life, don't waste your time with people who bring you down.
ReplyDeleteGood for you - handling the situation positively. Love this post! Love your blog! I just found it and I hope you don't mind that I'm an occasional lurker and have added you to my blogroll. :)
Christen Bliss